Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The Real Dr. Manhattan




Pictured above is Ken Wilber, an American author who writes on psychology, philosophy, mysticism, ecology, and spiritual evolution. As soon as I saw Dr. Manhattan in The Watchmen on the big screen I thought to myself - "KEN WILBER'S PENIS! They look completely alike!" Upon further inspection I realized that the similarities extend beyond the loins. Both bald, both built, but explore mystic states of consciousness. I searched "ken wilber dr. manhattan" in google and got nothing. Am I the only one who thinks he is about as close to a dead-ringer as you could expect to find?

For those that are interested in the study of consciousness, here is a video of Wilber playing with his brain.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Oh God.



http://blog.wired.com/underwire/2009/03/lego-star-trek.html

Photo City

In a dollar store recently I discovered stacks of 1988 Tim Wallach baseball card file folders. I didn't buy any but came very close. I certainly wouldn't have purchased them in 1988 but all these years later they seem like such a novelty. Pure dollar store item. Awesome.



Inside a downtown boutique hotel I spotted this contraption. "Is the heating busted?" I asked the doorman. Turns out this is not a heater. What else could it be? It could be a mechanized, electronic deodorizer I thought to myself, but felt silly suggesting that as a possibility. I asked the doorman. He said "its mechanized, electric deodorizer" like it was obvious or something. I took a closer look. The knob on the right says "Scent" and it goes from 1 to 10. What ever happened to flowers? Isn't this thing unsightly? What's next, robots holding Febreeze canisters?



We've all seen these. A stripped down bike, right? But this one caught me as unusually un-rusted and new looking to have been stripped of almost every last piece. Almost as if the owner had walked away from it only moments earlier. I thought he might run up to it screaming as I shot the picture. "Mannnnnnnnn, they even took the pedals." he would lament. "Yeah...maybe it was Igor?" I would respond in jest. It reminds me of an animal carcass that has been stripped clean to the bones.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Nickelback Outed at Juno Awards



Nickelback
admitted to fans and detractors alike during an award show acceptance speech Sunday night that they are in fact the product of a bet between two drunken record execs and have never had at any point in their lifetimes any musical ambition or ability.

"We're worse than Milli Vanilli, really, have you actually listened to our music?" said Nickelback drummer Joel McLarken, an ex-private school teacher who is both legally blind and deaf.

The band, fronted by transient drug-addict turned rockstar drug-addict Chad Kroeger, shot to fame in 2006 with the hit single "How You Remind Me."

When asked why they would reveal such potentially damaging information about the band McLarken said he "had had enough" and that all the accolades have "gone straight to Kroeger's stupid head." "He actually asked if he could plug in his guitar and sing for real at one of our concerts. What is he, nuts?" Others have echoed similar sentiments. "Chad's somehow convinced himself that he's really talented," road manager Gus Van Der Gauf commented recently.

"Chad grew up on the mean streets of Oshawa." said Kroeger to a stunned audience. He appeared to have not registered his band mates public confession only seconds earlier and proceeded to embarrass himself in front of a record Juno Award Show audience of estimated at 117. Kroger continued with his acceptance speech, "You guys know my uncle? Mr. Kroeger? Well, he was featured on Seinfeld. He was always the successful one in the family and I thought I had a life of commercial sanding ahead of me, but now look where I am. I have straight hair, a bi-sexual blonde wife and a like 400 f***ing JUNOs. I'm gonna mount this bitch on the front of my ATV!"

When asked after the broadcast if his intention was to mount his wife or the Juno to his recreational vehicle, Kroeger was unresponsive. He was seen moments later colouring strands of his hair with magic markers and poking a large breasted woman with the award then licking it and smiling creepily.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Creeeeeepy



This picture recently won a competition. For what? For the most convincing picture of a ghost!

From bbc.com

The picture, taken in May 2008, appears to show a man or woman wearing a ruff, looking through a barred window at Tantallon Castle in North Berwick, East Lothian.

No mannequins are used at the castle, and there are no costumed guides. Three photographic experts have confirmed that the photograph was not manipulated.

Christopher Aitchison, a visitor who took the photograph said: "I was not aware of anyone or anything being present in my picture, only noticing the anomaly when I got home. I did not notice any nice old ladies wearing ruffs walking around the stairs!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Captain Skyliner

My next career will be...

TATTOO ARTIST! or maybe out-of-focus photographer.

I call this one "Captain Skyliner"

I Have Talented Friends

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Biggest HDTV -- In the new Yankees Stadium

Where else?

The new Yankee Stadium contains the worlds largest HDTV--a 103 by 58 foot, 1080p HD Mitsubishi Diamond Vision LED display.

I guess you can pull out all the stops when you spend $1.3 billion on a stadium.

Here is a photo of the screen taken during a recent test:
http://blog.wired.com/photos/uncategorized/2009/03/25/3812721.jpg

The new scoreboard:
  • Is 6x larger than the screen at old Yankee Stadium
  • Is embedded with 8,601,600 LED lamps (covering a total of 5,925 square feet)
  • Can put up to four simultaneous images, with picture-in-picture capabilities
From wired.com:
Some fans are worried that the screen will overshadow the game itself. Since it's located at the same height as the stadium's second deck and seems to occupy a quarter of the whole outfield façade, this seems quite possible. That is prime viewing position for nearly everyone inside (including the players), and it's only natural to continually glance over at a giant flickering thing rather than the serene pastoral slowness of the game.
The screen in old Yankee Stadium:

Happy Greek Independence Day & Annunciation Day!



History of Greek Independence Day
In 1821, Greeks vigorously rose up against the oppressive Ottoman Empire which had occupied Greece for nearly four hundred years, embarking on the ultimately successful war of independence. Bishop Germanos of Patras boldly raised the Greek flag at the monastery of Agia Lavras, inciting the Peloponnese to rise against the oppressors.

The Feast of the Annunciation
On this day in the Orthodox calendar, the archangel Gabriel appeared to the maiden Mary and announced the news: she was pregnant with the divine child. Bishop Germanos chose this day to deliver a different but not unrelated message: a new spirit was about to be born in Greece.

The churches celebrate the Festival of the Annunciation with pomp, ceremony, and joy. The spectacle is especially vivid on the islands of Tinos and Idra (Hydra). Hydra, a maritime merchant power with a swift, well-maintained fleet, was a determined and effective supporter of the War for Independence, doubling the celebration there. You can also expect colorful religious ceremonies wherever the local monastery or church is named "Evangelisimos" or "Evangelistria", such as Panagia Evangelistria on Tinos.

Greek Independence Day is also celebrated by many of the Greeks of the diaspora, and large parades are becoming more common in United States cities where Greeks have made their homes, including Boston and New York City. Each year, the U.S. President marks Greek Independence Day with a proclamation reminding citizens of the contributions of Greece to democracy, and of the ongoing contributions of expatriate Greeks in their new communities throughout the world.

Elephant Bird?

From bbc.com:

What is reputed to be the largest egg in the world is displayed before it goes on auction in London. It was laid in the 17th Century by the now-extinct Great Elephant Bird of Madagascar.




From http://www.boneclones.com/sc-241.htm

The Elephant Bird
is considered the largest bird in history. Possibly existing for nearly 2 million years in Madagascar, it faced extinction by the middle of the 17th century. Related to other flightless birds like the ostrich and emu, this heavy-set herbivore measured approximately 10 feet and 1,000 pounds, three times the weight of an 8-foot ostrich. These birds were hunted by local inhabitants, and may have been seen by the first Europeans to visit the island. Likely not a fast runner as indicated by the relative lengths of its leg bones, it may have relied on its massive size and pointed beak to defend itself.

And guess what? That skeleton is for sale. Its not real bones, its a reproduction, but it can yours for a mere $18,000. Or save money and buy it disassembled Ikea style for only $14,400.

Double Survivor

The only man to survive both Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

According to bbc.com:

Tsutomu Yamaguchi was in Hiroshima on a business trip on 6 August 1945 when a US plane dropped the first atomic bomb.

He suffered serious burns and spent a night there before returning to his home city of Nagasaki just before it was bombed on 9 August.

He is now 93 years old.



Full story:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7963581.stm

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

You're called what?

Yesterday I passed a construction site where the name of the main contractor was ButtCon. I was surprised anyone would give their company such a seemingly inappropriate moniker. How can they go to business meetings and expect to be taken seriously?

Then today...

Thank You Dru!



From bbc.com:

60-foot penis painted on roof

An 18-year-old has secretly painted a 60ft drawing of a phallus on the roof of his parents' £1million mansion in Berkshire. It was there for a year before his parents found out. They say he'll have to scrub it off when he gets back from travelling.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Raining Sunshine

This is a cool looking car, no?

Trapped Joell

Joell got trapped in a fence the other day.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Tristan da Cunha - Remotest Inhabited Island On Earth



Tristan da Cunha is the most remote inhabited archipelago in the world. How remote? Well, it’s a volcanic group of islands in the south Atlantic Ocean located, get this… 2,816 km from South Africa and 3,360 km from South America.

Just look at this map:


Only 271 people live there. Visitors are permitted, and I for one would love to go, but it's not easy to do so. People considering a trip to Tristan da Cunha are warned they need to plan at least a year in advance and then they may only "pencil in" the trip because they also need permission from the island's administrator.

So you've gained permission to visit, but how are you going to get there?

The island does not have an airport, so until recently the easiest way to visit was via Britain’s last remaining mail ship, the RMS St Helena. But this service came to an end last February, an ageing vessel and rising costs making it increasingly untenable. Now the only way to visit this ineffably distant place is by finding a berth on one of the tiny South African fishing boats that make the journey to Tristan seven or eight times a year to collect crayfish, the island’s main source of income.

Its remote, and full of crayfish and hard to get to. Anything else? Well, the island is basically just a volcano.


The settlement, named Edinburgh of the Seven Seas, is a haphazard collection of tin-roofed bungalows which clings onto one of only two small coastal strips; the rest is sheer rock cliffs.


How the heck did people come to live here?

The island was discovered 500 years ago by a Portuguese admiral named Tristão da Cunha, and was first settled several centuries later. In 1816 the United Kingdom claimed and began to settle the islands. A small British military garrison was established to prevent the island being used as an escape route by Napoleon Bonaparte. This was never particularly likely as it would have involved Napoleon – who had been exiled to St Helena – making an enormous detour of some 2,500km. The British soon realised the folly of this venture and pulled out the garrison, but Corporal William Glass of the Royal Artillery – who was to become the first chief islander – his wife, children and two Devonian stonemasons, Samuel Burnell and John Nankivel, chose to remain on Tristan. They were joined by the occasional shipwreck survivor over the next few decades and in 1856 the island's population was 71. However, the next year starvation caused many to flee leaving a population of 28 on Tristan da Cunha. In time, despite more than 200cm of rain a year, hurricanes, gales and the threat of the volcano erupting, the island became a thriving micro-economy through the sale of crayfish and rare postage stamps to the outside world. The islanders endured a two-year exile in the UK when the volcano erupted in 1961, destroying the crayfish factory but sparing Edinburgh of the Seven Seas. Incredibly, despite the islanders’ exposure to cars, electricity, nightclubs and rock ’n’ roll music during their stay in Calshott, Hampshire, almost every single one of them voted to return to the island at the earliest possible opportunity. This was despite persistent attempts by the UK government to block their return on the grounds that the island was now uninhabitable and suitable only as a site for nuclear testing. Many elderly islanders were so traumatized by their experience in the so-called civilized world that they have remained on Tristan da Cunha ever since.

Here's an account from a journalist who visited the island:

One of the first things that you notice about Tristanians is their accent. The isolation from the outside world has created a local dialect that is a curious blend of early 19th-century colonial language (for instance, to feel ill in Tristan dialect is to feel ‘qualmish’, a word that died out in Britain in the early years of Queen Victoria’s reign) and contemporary South African slang (pick-up trucks are known here, as in Cape Town, as ‘bakkies’). When outsiders – or ’station fellas’ as they are dubbed in a reference to the garrison stationed on the island during World War II – are around, the Tristan people’s accent mellows to a soft, quiet lilt, reminiscent of the West Country. When talking among themselves, however, islanders’ conversations appear all but unintelligible – a situation that I sensed they were keen to maintain.

A walk around the whole of Edinburgh of the Seven Seas takes just 15 minutes. Rising up behind the settlement is the endless cliff face of the volcano, covered with gulches that become torrential waterfalls when the rains set in. To the left of the village, only 200m away from the last house, you can see the enormous lava flow of 1961 which left a mountain of debris under which the original crayfish factory is buried. All the houses in the village are single-storey buildings that face towards the ocean. From the outside at least, most of them are virtually identical to the original cottages built by the island’s earliest settlers. Loyalty to the crown is taken seriously and many houses contain a portrait of Queen Elizabeth II.

Another first hand account of the life and people of Tristan da Cunha:

"Come and pull up a pew, man. There’s loads of vodka to be drunk!" Leon Glass, 23-year-old son of Conrad, the island’s policeman, offers me a stirring welcome at the Albatross Inn, Tristan da Cunha’s only pub. Open from 10am each day, it is a smart modern building where imported South African lager is just 60p a can and the surrounding ocean, rich in seafood, means that delicacies such as lobster quiche replace more usual pub snacks. ‘There aren’t many young people on the island at the moment,’ Glass tells me. ‘But those of us that are here want to stay. Almost nobody ever leaves Tristan for good. The quality of life here is so high. It’s so safe; you know everybody and there are no worries for anybody in terms of money. I worked for a little while as a nightclub bouncer in Birmingham, where I saw some horrific fights and brawls. I’m glad I’ve visited the outside world, but I’m happiest here on the island.’ Glass’s attitude is echoed by Mike Hentley, the current Administrator of Tristan. He has lived on the island for three years now and has presided over a period of great modernisation, including the installation of a new satellite communications system in 2006 which has allowed the locals to set up an internet café, and call the outside world at the rate of only 2p a minute. This is an enormous improvement on the eye-watering £6.50 per email and £1.80 per minute for phone calls that was the norm up to that point. ‘We’ve only got one TV channel on Tristan,’ says Hentley, as we talk in the spacious lounge of his house, which comes complete with a fluttering Union Jack in the front garden. ‘It’s the British Forces channel that comes from the Falklands, but I think even that has helped to put the people here off the outside world! They know that this is a very special place with a very tight-knit community. We have our problems, of course, but everyone here is so well looked after that there is no real desire to leave. Everyone is employed by either the government or Ovenstone [a South African company with an exclusive contract to sell the highly coveted Tristan crayfish to the US and Japan] to fish or maintain the village, and we have our own apartments in Cape Town where islanders can stay very cheaply if they want to take a holiday. We’re almost completely self-sufficient here, unlike St Helena, which receives aid from the UK. Where else can you leave your house and car unlocked, or let your children go off camping on their own?’ But today even Tristan da Cunha is not completely free of the seditions of the outside world. Obesity is a problem, and Hently is currently leading a campaign to cut down the amount of alcohol consumed by the islanders: the culture of getting ‘half touched’ on most evenings is deeply ingrained in Tristan society. Another troubling issue is the lack of qualifications among Tristanians. Children leave the very basic island school at 15, and though there is the option to take GCSEs a year later, results are poor, creating a situation where even islanders who do want to leave are hampered in finding a job in the UK or South Africa. Yet, having fought so hard to return home after the eruption, the islanders have a rare attachment to their home. As the most remote community on earth, the people of Tristan are no longer quite as detached from the outside world as they once were. But as far as the strength and survival instinct of this reminder of the Empire goes, this place is unique. The slogan for the island – ‘Our faith is our strength’ – could not be more apt.

Some interesting facts:

Mail only arrives 10 times a year.

Only seven surnames exist on Tristan da Cunha. These are: Glass, Green, Hagan, Laverello, Repetto, Rogers and Swain.

There are instances of health problems attributed to endogamy, including asthma and glaucoma, largely because of the inevitable marriages among closely related couples, for example marriages between second degree cousins, that comes with having such a small gene pool. The current population is thought to have descended from 15 ancestors, eight males and seven females who arrived on the island at various times between 1816 and 1908. The male founders originated from Scotland, England, Holland, the USA and Italy.. There is a very high incidence of asthma among the population and research by Dr. Noe Zamel of the University of Toronto has led to discoveries about the genetic nature of the disease. Three of the original settlers of the island were sufferers.

This is their flag and coat of arms:






I wrote some of this and directly plagiarized other parts from:

http://www.cnntravellermagazine.com/2007/01/01/world-report-2/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_da_Cunha

http://geography.about.com/od/specificplacesofinterest/a/tristandacunha.htm

Friday, March 20, 2009

Sports Notes

My friend has a blog and wrote a great piece about college vs. NBA basketball...

http://internetwebsite.wordpress.com/2009/03/20/good-versus-great/

Also this bombshell from Onion Sports!

Fidel Castro Planning To Defect During World Baseball Classic

World Baseball Classic




I love the World Baseball Classic. LOVE IT! I love everything about watching the global game of baseball played out between countries, rather than pro teams. The players are passionate, and the fans are into it. It's beautiful, but...

Its fucked. Really fucked. The timing is horrible. HORRIBLE! So many of the best players are not taking part because of injury concerns and a lot of super high calibre players who are participating aren't performing like their normal selves because they are not in regular season form yet. These guys are machines and their bodies are accustomed to a light spring training schedule at this time of year to gradually prepare for opening day. To expect them to be able to show up during spring training once every three years and actually play up to their potential is ludicrous.

The general consensus seems to be that there is no other time that this tournament could be held.

Jayson Stark of ESPN.com has some interesting things to say about the WBC, as well as a solution for the scheduling problems. He plans to create the ultimate week of baseball. Check the link: http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/worldclassic2009/columns/story?columnist=stark_jayson&id=3999459&campaign=rss&source=MLBHeadlines

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Festivus



Frank Costanza:
And at the Festivus dinner, you gather your family around, and tell them all the ways they have disappointed you over the past year! The tradition of Festivus begins with the Airing of Grievances. I got a lot of problems with you people! And now, you're gonna hear about it. You, Kruger. My son tells me your company STINKS!
George Costanza: Oh, God.

Whitney Houston - I Wanna Dance With Somebody



Whitney was so hot back in 1987. I think Beyonce stole her look.

The Star Spangled Banner

If you know me, you've probably heard me talk about Marvin Gaye and Whitney Houston's renditions of The Star Spangled Banner. Two of my favourites.



Dogs and Ducks

This is not the video I wanted to post. The video I wanted to post can be viewed at this location: http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/video/2009/mar/17/essy-duck-dog

However, the following is still cute. Both videos show clearly why we keep dogs as pets and not chimps.

Real Life Ray Guns



The future is now.
http://blog.wired.com/defense/2009/03/military-laser.html

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Baby Hippo

Awwwwwwwwwwww

You Don't Know My Travis



This chimp, or one that looks just like it, recently attacked a woman, ripping off her face and leaving her brain damaged. The chimp's owner had called the woman over to help with "Travis" and "Travis", who had been raised in her home since he was 3 days old, went haywire!

Props to TB for turning me on to the story.

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20090317.wchimp0317/BNStory/Front/?page=rss&id=RTGAM.20090317.wchimp0317

There's lots of videos about this story and I believe a recording of the 911 call, if you've got the guts to sit through it.

Here's my thoughts on the issue:

It's a wild fucking animal! If we could domesticate them into good pets we would have done it long ago! Stupid human idiots.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Defective Teddy Bear

Are huge teddy bears recyclable? And for that matter, who disposes of those sorts of things? Face down too...it seems so sad.


Saturday, March 14, 2009

Friday, March 13, 2009

Thursday, March 12, 2009

The Joker



A man dressed as the Joker was shot and killed by police yesterday in a Virginia National Park. He was a crazy army soldier who stabbed and stun-gunned his army roommate earlier that day. He was said to be obsessed with Heath Ledger's Joker character and was even wearing face paint at the time of his death. Police opened fire after the man pointed a loaded shotgun at them and refused to put it down.

Morbid.

Are people just crazy, or is there really something to this Joker making people psychotic argument?

Here's the full story:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/mar/13/police-shoot-man-dressed-as-joker

Stevie Ray Vaughan

Stevie Ray Vaughan was a guitar freak of nature. This is a video of him playing "Texas Flood" live at Toronto's El Mocambo in 1983. One review I read said that this is like a brilliant essay on how to play electric blues guitar. Indeed. He plays the guitar behind his back so well it almost seems fake.



Of note: SRV was John Mayer's idol growing up and you can tell that Mayer modelled his vocal style after him.

StarCraft and Porn in University



Did you know?

At the University of California, Berkley you can take a course on StarCraft called "The Strategy of StarCraft"?

At
State University of New York at Buffalo you can take a course called "Cyberporn and Society" in which you actually watch porn in class.

Smoking weed would actually help you study. Amazing!

Here's a list of the 15 strangest University courses out there.
http://www.onlinecolleges.net/2009/02/25/the-15-strangest-college-courses-in-america/

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

De-Evolution


Crazy Man Takes on Niagara Falls


Giant chunks of ice floating around a maniac

Yesterday a man jumped over a retaining wall and into the river approaching Niagara Falls. He somehow managed to survive the 55 meter drop over the Horseshoe Falls--however, the impact ripped all the clothes from his body. He then swam around naked in the ice-cold, swirling waters below the falls for over 30 minutes, resisting rescue attempts the entire time! It gets more amazing. A local hero in a helicopter (Hooman? Matt Czernecki?) came over and used the force from the rotors blades to create a current that blew the man toward the shore where he was scooped up by the fire department.

I'm going to go ahead and assume this guy's an American.

Check out the link for the full story and some videos.
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20090311.wfalls0311/BNStory/National/home

You creepy weirdo



You creepy werido. What are you staring at? Are you even human? Why are you wearing a touque? I bet you love to go to clubs. If I ever see your creepy ass around any women I know and care about I will rent a bulldozer and run you over.

OLIVER!!!


Part of the ceiling collapsed in my house today. This is what it looks like when a ceiling tries to be ground.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

SLAMBALL!!!!

Remember Slamball? Basketball with trampolines and hitting.


Guess what? It still exists. Pat Croce is the commissioner and its broadcast on Versus in the States.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Custom Plates

License plate I saw last night on the way to a friends house. I love tan too.

Toronto Neighbourhoods Map


Even though I'm a proud Torontonian there are so many neighbourhood names I was unaware of. So many neighbourhoods in our great city.

http://www3.thestar.com/static/googlemaps/starmaps.html?xml=090120_shapetool_neigbourhoods.xml

Friday, March 6, 2009